Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Arson

Dinner,
dead of winter,
half frozen,
thawing out in some szechuan wok in Oregon

I notice a painted blue bird mocking me
it being painted on my table
I ignore it, and order peanut butter chicken with crab cakes
and recollect the sweet bird calls that last spring brought me

the beginning of my seasonal work in the woods
the restlessness of winter over

this being December I find my self longing for May
back to square one
back to hibernation
forced into the cold wet struggle again

the branch the bird sits on blossoms
looming almost cynically
regardless of restaurant
regardless of my dull drums
a simple bird in tree painted on wood
who'd of thought
glazed with glossy varnish
beautiful even for a cheesy oriental depiction

i take wooden pencil to paper and try to record
change my words hopelessly around
the tree on the table
the pencil on the paper
speaking

who built this table?
who felled this tree?
what real birds graced this tree before?
and were they really blue?

im glad this table is here though
to support my plate
to create my poem on
to provide a surface for my pencil

maybe the same?

I enjoy the artists mock renditions of life against preserved polished board
this table is multipurpose
contains multitudes
its form and knots
a variable I cant understand
but informing me

now that I know this table is as interested in me
as I in it
id almost like to be there for its demise
ignite my small napkin with these etchings
set it free
make kindling of my pencil
and scorch the blue bird and its happy home

invite the artist,
lumber jack,
and carpenter
to watch our creation smoke and ash

up up up

into the harsh December sky

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Shelter

rock n' roll

"frozen beer"

"FUN"

''''fuck'''''

mythologists consider the current climate change occurring boring
We Found Your Current Phone, Address, Age & More with the help

of your father

stold your s.s.

"its funny how we learn antisocial behavior from a box we watch alone"

see these figures struggle with each-other
fade in and out

watch them watch tv
in the continuum

everything's a joke



27 Facts You Don't Know About Your own Personality

that we learned from your mother
today but maybe yesterday

we change

you have no idea when we acquired this


war

war

war
I wanna reenact a civil war reenactment alone
two years ago

in high school gym

I wanna show nature movies in nature

on the stairs

in or in the city u left


I wanna be a hero in your mock wedding

Saturday, December 5, 2009

an exclamation

Upon travel a great deal of preparation is required.
One must take on a multitude of items for secret consideration. Mix them up scramble them in our id, check them for validity.
Often, premeditated travel can cause illness, or even dramatic queasiness in our silly stomachs.


Buuuuuuuutterflyyyyyyyyyy's caaaa-tippleeeeeeeeeeers creeeeepy craaaaaaaaawlers.

Never the less we appear completely different
to different individuals through out the different locations that make up our lives. You seem distant around your father, and he childish around his.
Its absurd to even compare our petty travels to our ancestors or maybe even the pioneers epic excursions .
Though what ive gathered so far is consistent with their gripes this constant contradicting of myself is only proving my point.

This stated our individual self importance and petty pursuits guide us differently.
An individual must decided for themselves a destination on which to quest , and later commit a reasonable arrival to. Said location being far or near, across
choppy ocean or next door on the neighbors TV. With out commitment we stay sedentary and complacent in our own bubbles. Observers,
Starving in our fathers robes and our siblings pajamas comatose d with cartoons.

Other items before migration are necessary for consideration too.
A reliable mode of transportation must be obtained, of course
legally or frantically, the previous preferably than the latter.
Goodbyes and hellos are inevitable ,travel currency a necessity and equal burden.
The spread of highway and land under our feet requires other resources. Effecting our mood and motivation or peer groups.
Often these are acquired from the very land we travel above. Metal to graft our automobiles, food to energize
our body's to navigate our wills.
We alone understand what we are willing to surrender, in order to move in our multitude of different ways.
The Banter and talk of travel is ancient, almost primal in the sense that we build our relationships on present location, and

ego on our future place in it. We travel to acquire goods, we acquire goods to travel.
To settle is certain death, a certain surrender to the landscapes that haunt our animal self's.
Must we live where we shit, where our elders drown?


A constant relation to ourselves through movement is required for survival .
What makes us human, at best is what makes us the better animal.

What we lack in feeling we gain in ability, to settle land is not to neglect our love, but sharpen it until dullness.

Illusion of certainty leads to a fanaticism with self. Fanaticism is not fascination ill prove it to you.
We are told one leads us we are told the other tunes us.

I assure you Everett new such topics of misfortune more than I.Maybe he could lecture for hours, or even write on it.
Later I may relate to you how this relates to me, but for now I feel
a brief history of Everrets romps will better suit my agenda. My agenda being the purpose of everything I create and everywhere I go.
My agenda being the same as my grandfathers and his fathers before him.

At a young age Jasper was placed by his father into an orphanage. This being a major travesty in any young mans life it shall be
further explained. Jasper's father being
a poor farmer in western Nebraska he had experienced a rough go at things to say the least. Just

recently abandoned by his wife his incapability at fathering had just begun shown through like never before. A steady diet of
booze and barn burning had occupied his thoughts for the latter years but acting upon his fantasy's was beyond the timid church
going mans grasps. Further more frowned upon by his stern Goliath german mother

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Perhaps
to twist the wire and drive the posts

is indicative of
our pastures
harsh treatment

with untitled castle

(beating death)

mocking mother


tonight is tonight left forever

we make our pilgrimage a pilgrimage


with the many parts that make up our bones

mere stones slapped together by weather

mere shapes designed with glory

my French counterpart (done) with me

a selfish

FEMALE

bewildered with heart in sack

finished my

mix of tools for grandpa

to build fence with

to twist the wire and drive the posts

Perhaps

to twist the wire and drive the posts
Burned out
harsh treatment

with untitled castle

(beating death)

mocking mother


tonight is tonight left forever

we make our pilgrimage a pilgrimage


with the many parts that make up our bones

mere stones slapped together by weather

mere shapes designed with glory

my French counterpart (done) with me

a selfish

FEMALE

bewildered with heart in sack

finished my

mix of tools for grandpa

to build fence with

to twist the wire and drive the posts

Burnt out

Burn out
harsh treatment redirected

tonight is tonight left forever

we make our pilgrimage a pilgrimage

(beating death)

mocking mother

with untitled castle

and the many parts that make up our bones

mere stones slapped together by weather

mere shapes designed with glory

my French counterpart (done) left me a selfish

FEMALE

bewildered with heart in sack

finished my

mix of tools for grandpa

to build fence with

to twist the wire and drive the posts

Burn out

harsh treatment redirected

tonight and tonight left forever

we make our pilgrimage a pilgrimage (beating death)

mocking mother
with untitled castle

and the many parts that make up our bones

mere stones shaped by weather

mere shapes designed for glory

my French counterpart (done) left us selfish

FEMALE

bewildered with heart in sack

finished my

mix of tools for grandpa

to build fence with

to twist the wire and drive the posts

Thursday, November 19, 2009

its ok im a saint

a partitioned box and measurable hoax

I meant to leave home sooner

through out those escapees

who were unorthodox-ed

and also in the muddy streets

characterized by hearsay

and black impulse in toe

now and again stuck between the meadows curs

where immense heritage and forlorn past met

learned the pacifist pain in the good morning

structure weighing on me wholly


upright


my sainthood questioned

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Briefing

Approach that which examines
A well calculated beneficiary
Shades where of Some ponderer
lowered by October 1950 perhaps the more suitable areas where over due cover over
were alter fun in eyes
regret the easy making
of the system non noticeable
of disturbance which one could cure the crossroad village



"""""""""""sexy witch"""""""""""



The second spot visited west of the university
In which phantoms appeared
disheveled
some possibly where not controlled
some probably were
With the help of a lot healthier things than the previous ones
sought after
by blank ecosystem travel
by bull frog plague
swamp resembled
the same drought
that planned to advance itself with
the walking of strings

Saturday, November 14, 2009

mammoth delphiniums in November

remove whats left from the suitcase
place the items in the sink
bury it all in suds in the mid afternoon

regret leaving


damp
socks, ties, and a handguns

loaded

but not lost in the soup

dusting the mantle madam
dust the mantle

flawlessly

where the horse head lamp glistens
under which I split my head on Christmas

a knight sharpening me with

blood settling on presents

my new Lego fortress set ruined


give up on the dishes from yesterday
give up on the fucking dishes today

" spent the entire day on this"

your new concussion

your old mantra

made sure we laughed when the cock sucking was through

the lawyers were paid

conclusions and cars scraped

and the big brick chimneys were reduced to rubble

grandfather clock too


"i want you to stare at me all the way through the mirror"

my weak eyes will not put on a performance without inspiration

nor will we be reaping the benefits without distraction this evening


I touch the museums stockings at night

feel up the various velvet dividers

separating the public from other mammoths

I pray for the skeletons to appear in my breakfast nook

join me for coffee

man handle my toast with calcium

they can watch me eat my captain crunch too

the dead are the dead are the dead

even with sugar

but who will ring the bells with such sought after sorrow?

who will chase down the midnight wavelengths with me?

from perfect alimony

or fanatics drive ways

where was it that we could hang out our cloths?


ten stories up
one window to the left
two floors down
Catty corner to delusion
where the delphiniums hang slightly out the windows

and there figures project shadows on the sidewalk


I would speak for such ornamental s if they needed me

one quick spread of sarcasm

with my dirty Midwestern tongue

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Wallace Stevens six Significant Landscapes

Share |


Six Significant Landscapes





I
An old man sits
In the shadow of a pine tree
In China.
He sees larkspur,
Blue and white,
At the edge of the shadow,
Move in the wind.
His beard moves in the wind.
The pine tree moves in the wind.
Thus water flows
Over weeds.

II
The night is of the colour
Of a woman's arm:
Night, the female,
Obscure,
Fragrant and supple,
Conceals herself.
A pool shines,
Like a bracelet
Shaken in a dance.

III
I measure myself
Against a tall tree.
I find that I am much taller,
For I reach right up to the sun,
With my eye;
And I reach to the shore of the sea
With my ear.
Nevertheless, I dislike
The way ants crawl
In and out of my shadow.

IV
When my dream was near the moon,
The white folds of its gown
Filled with yellow light.
The soles of its feet
Grew red.
Its hair filled
With certain blue crystallizations
From stars,
Not far off.

V
Not all the knives of the lamp-posts,
Nor the chisels of the long streets,
Nor the mallets of the domes
And high towers,
Can carve
What one star can carve,
Shining through the grape-leaves.

VI
Rationalists, wearing square hats,
Think, in square rooms,
Looking at the floor,
Looking at the ceiling
.
They confine themselves
To right-angled triangles.
If they tried rhomboids,
Cones, waving lines, ellipses --
As, for example, the ellipse of the half-moon --
Rationalists would wear sombreros.

Monday, October 12, 2009

BITCH

yellow flannel
holding books about bats

your too kinds of scary

your old news now
prob went back to Nursing school sick
black and white photo bop
glasses over nose
white shallow shell

read me deep into the night

Sunday, September 6, 2009

Autumn Begins in Martins Ferry, Ohio by James Wright

In the Shreve High football stadium,
I think of Polacks nursing long beers in Tiltonsville,
And gray faces of Negroes in the blast furnace at Benwood,
And the ruptured night watchman of Wheeling Steel,
Dreaming of heroes.

All the proud fathers are ashamed to go home.
Their women cluck like starved pullets,
Dying for love.

Therefore,
Their sons grow suicidally beautiful
At the beginning of October,
And gallop terribly against each other's bodies.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Take Up Thy Stethoscope

my friends been served papers

I TRIED TO RUN DEFENSE

AWNSWERED THE DOOR AND SHIT

overdose at a hospital two yEARS AGO

ANIMAL PLANET PUT ON FOR YOUR COME DOWN WILL COST YOU

CALL THOSE FUCKERS UP AND GIVE THEM SOME MONEY

THESE FUCKERS DONT KNOW WHO THEIR DEALING WITH

Saturday, July 25, 2009

Conclave

Deathly startled by whom who may ride

This evening’s curses

Caresses subtle shore

My mind connects Hawaii via driven orphan trains
For some reason
Beneath Cartographer bones

A prairie
skewed us in dust
dry glasses in route

To rob

Farmers
Without ammunition
Of half truths

who hitched rides to Hawaii
in the hot air balloon morning

before the Japanese could even conceive a sneak attack

sweet Everett swam ashore

so I could be born

avoided search lights and family

as his mother did too

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Black Widow

Latrodectus hesperus
We have no pitty
Pored out onto equestrians
outhouse
and smashed
No Abdominal pain
but with headache in toilet rolls

red hourglass Idled turnings of you
identified in books
on black arachnid
To coax you into bottle
Took patience
survived the cleaning only to appear
unscathed Inches before my two hands

Monday, May 18, 2009

Trouble

Houses like this choose to wear
Either way suits us and or all of us

They want it

The house
Worn or not worn

“it” as in the tenants

Covered slithering smooth

regardless
The tenants are bound to be

Cursed

Imagine a tenant such as yourself without house but with poem

Aloof under
gutters
singing in the shower



Worn inside out or like slippers and robe in the gorgeous yard
With Easter lilies
Beat by Bubbles and stones thrown at siding


Family forlorn with like lost pets

Monday, May 4, 2009

Salvage

Juniper junking midday

Jasper in the well

drowns

Words explain to me how Humboldt cut

Fade in with

bearded men in desperation

log me too

chop

before I become relentless

his oxygen bottle breaths and stretches

the magnetic crane clamps up the steal

effortlessly

I enjoy how it separates the metals from each other

The aluminum left below

The trailer left on the ground

Saturday, February 21, 2009

NEBRASKA CITY NEBRASKA

NEBRASKA CITY NEBRASKA
I am making maps
I don’t want to make no more maps of Oregon mama!
I want to make maps of home
I want maps of corn mazes !
and railroad tracks I’ve pissed on
railroad tracks I’ve given into stubbornly
houses I’ve drank booze in deservingly
Ill make these maps in my head one at a time

scratching my beardwhile the time continues accordingly

Im in no means consumed
By the carelessness of time
shapes appearing
recklessly
hanging on to these splints

I Organize them into packs
hoped to organized them into stanzas
while naysayers observed

but the gathering of needs i needed exemplified
in Februarys stale motionless depiction of Jesus’ s cross
In John Falter’s grand daughter Sierra's Kiss
amongst his down town glorifications
of Christmas time in Falls City
his jeep carrying Doug fir in the midst
Of the few fascists

Jews jews jews
Saved in the mid west

And I ponder its 200 years of existence
selfishly
while my German grandfather burry’s the bodies of Americans
gray hairs
during World War One

his whereabouts
concealed
not knowing what it means
to be a
torn up immigrant
by the light of day
parents marriage in poverty

by my parents churn of un human clamber
after one month of love

marriage failing at 39 years of artlessness
sick first year in Nebraska
sex ending in disparity
holding on
to nothing

hiding in Emmitt Kelly’s
antics

our children are
resorting
to these tree’s magnitude
and grandeur
exemplifying these trees I trust in
the Ozarks leaving us

Susan waiting for the dead
SUSAN where I was born
and driven home in mini vans
with my sisters concerned

Rolla Missouri
To the Willamette valley scattered

22 years
amongst
my wineries
and shame

where wilderness
on Christmas eve
comes bearing gifts in the morning

viewed by my friends as flattering
returning boys who murdered my next of kin
my dog buried
in the reservoirs

willingly sinking
climbing these steeples of our fathers churches
ignoring threats
and burgeons
of these three distant chimes of the catholic churches bells

old fishermen crucified by the
Joy in the world
solemn in thetelevisions glare

crucifix hanging between my V-neck
and my t- shirt’ s chest
where the burns I received on
Easter morning ruin my
drunken neighbors wifes ceremonies

and my fathers half assed attempts at reconstruction
are astonishing

romances half conceived ends
while money is laundered
by the stale glare of the hospitals
light poles
you poured your heart out
Through your window shades and glares
you told me you were a saint

sorry Your father was a recruiter
I too young too heed the call
For religion and or war
to young to hear
The guttural yearnings of
the hemlocks end job on Socrates
The Endless doubt of
Descartes
becoming my own

Friday, February 6, 2009

Genetics

upon leaving I fell ill
books and sunsets held against ones shoulders
deceiving
piercing blight before dawn
amongst 100 harvests
and attempts
failed at family gatherings perceived in tune
below and above floors
where grandfather once ate his dinner
solemnly
and peered out his window at what burdened him
and what would later burden me

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Step brothers

your gonna have to borrow someone else
well i cant go anymore
to mountain tops
im bleeding
its really important
the dirt man
i just want to use it for a few days.

i'd even give you a key to our house
don't fret man

it's not my problem, and dont throw in my parents school
my priority is to not evolve my life in with the time your in and
around your secret places


Listen I know this was kinda rude and im sorry, but you're gonna have to think of something else, hell buy another bad one or two

that bad.......you can go ahead and get pissed but its not going to change the situation
in Kansas

Tuesday, January 13, 2009


steamboats return me vividly
with the wicked
without methroughout Peru and Brownville
where
the oldest town in Nebraska blinks
wine and whisky
thrown down dangerously
setting the quiet and small bookstores up for disaster
amongst the cool January wish wash
and the new years day dreams

Saturday, January 10, 2009

my cup is full
but bile words remain
with the wrecking of cars in snow
winged tipped avenger
winning
bile words
punched by friends
amoungst warm winters
for the use of
the wrecking of cars in snow
sheltering strangers
my cup
sheltering ill actions
leaving only to return to previous places left
by plane
but bile words remain

Tuesday, January 6, 2009